“Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That’s why it’s a comfort to go hand in hand.”
We seem to learn the most through our relationships, and the deeper the relationship, often the bigger the lessons. Many of my clients come to me for insight into their relationships and love – it seems that nothing else can take us to the blissful heights and terrible lows that love can. Here are some of the insights that I have learned over 25 years of psychic practice (and from making few big mistakes when younger – didn’t we all!)
Like Attracts Like
This spiritual law goes back to the most ancient days of Babylon, Persia and Greece, and is still very relevant today. The theory is that all things of a similar spiritual vibration will be drawn to each other, and that each person we choose to have a relationship has the same level of strength, health and insecurity etc, even if it looks very different on the outside. This is not to say that having a bad relationship is your fault – it isn’t – especially abusive relationships. No one has the right to abuse anyone and the blame lies with the perpetrator as it is a criminal act. However, bad relationships often act as a mirror and serve to show us what we don’t want and where our own weaknesses lie. Too many times I’ve seen insecurity and poor self-worth making really amazing women put up with far too much from deadbeat men. However, over time the wisdom you gain from these relationships can be ultimately be used to make you better and stronger and wiser in love, bringing happiness in the future.
If you want to attract healthy, positive relationships into your life, the best thing you can do is work on yourself and becoming the strongest, happy, most confident ‘you’ possible. You will give off a much more positive vibration and will attract better, healthier relationships as a result. You will also be less likely to get caught up in unhealthy relationships because you will be strong enough to walk away, and confident enough to value the good life you have built for yourself.
Over recent decades there has been a lot written and said about soul mates. There is often the concept that there is only one perfect person for you in the world who is just right. From experience I have come to believe that there are many soul mates who come into our lives, sometimes for very different reasons. Some soul mates act as the spark which starts a new way of life and a rebirth of the spirit and emotions. But these people are not meant to stay in your life forever, and when the relationship has served its purpose it will end – often clearing the way for a better relationship. Of course the perfect soul mate is the one who comes into your life and stays with you forever. This does happen to people of all ages and life stages – often when they are least expecting it. I have been lucky that it happened to me with my husband Brent.
It is true that having that spiritual and life connection with someone gives you the potential to have a ‘perfect’ relationship. But as anyone who has been in a committed long term relationship knows, it is often the way we treat each other day to day that makes a partnership work or not.
Making It Work in the Real World
Very often I see clients whose relationship is perfect in the emotional and spiritual realm, but can’t function in the real world. Things like the daily grind of work, bills and housework can often take the shine off a perfect love – especially when you have completely different values about money etc. This can often be a sign that the relationship will struggle to function at a healthy level long term. It may be that this person is a spiritual catalyst who will spark positive changes in you, but not the right person for you long term.
One thing I have learned over the years is that if two people really love each other, are committed – and get the help they need when things are difficult, they will be able to make the relationship work and stay together. An exception to this is in cases of abuse, no one should ever stay in those circumstances. But for most people it is normal to have a few rough times, even in the happiest relationships. It is a fact that if you are going to spend 50 years joined at the hip – someone is going to get poked in the eye at some point!
Remember, there are very few people who have been married for 50 years who haven’t had at least one time where they didn’t see how the relationship could survive, but it did.